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‘Atlanta’ recap: Season 2, Episode 3: ‘I love you, bro. I wouldn’t hurt you.‘

Every square inch of a strip club is a swindle, and they play Earn like Jimi Hendrix played guitar

Season 2, Episode 3 Money Bag Shawty

“This town run off stuntin’ on people.” — Paper Boi

Family, it’s time. We have to have an honest discussion about Earn and his inept (and at times hilarious) spending habits. Of Earn, Darius and Paper Boi, Earn is the easiest target. He believes no one respects him; the waiter who brought the guys free shots absolutely didn’t. To quote Cuffs, Earn’s “tired of being humble.” He wants to stunt on everyone who’s taken advantage of him and on everyone who has not taken him seriously in The A.

If you’ve ever visited or lived in or currently live in Atlanta, you know it’s not much different from any other big American city: The social ecosystem relies on flexing. The problem with Earn, as with so many others, is that he doesn’t have “it.” And by “it,” I mean money. And when he does have money, he fumbles it away. The most recent example of this occurred in the last episode.

And now here he is blowing through another check — this one from his and Paper Boi’s music hustle. To be fair, wanting to take Van out on a real date — remember that didn’t go so well during season one’s “Go For Broke” episode — is commendable, and he should’ve done that. Unfortunately, the South goes full South when a (white) man flashes a gun on them. Then Earn gets kicked out of the hookah spot because the owner says he used a counterfeit $100 bill. He didn’t, and the club owner was tripping, but at this point Earn is basically Charlie Brown and life is Lucy.

His last solace is a strip club — big business if you know even the slightest bit about The A. Onyx, to be exact. He buys out a section for the squad in hopes of redeeming the night. What could possibly go wrong in a strip club?

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Watching Earn get hustled in every inch of the strip club is sad, frustrating and comical. Strip club prices make airport prices seem like a yard sale. And if you’re not careful, the DJ will have you blowing all $50 in singles you walked in with, because, pride.

Every square inch of the strip club is a swindle, and they play Earn like Jimi Hendrix played guitar. Van too: She feels bad for a stripper whom ostensibly no one was tipping (a game she’s been running for years, according to Paper Boi). “Ain’t like you supposed to be out here saving money,” Darius says. You can’t save money in a strip club, so you have to at least game the system while you’re there — which Earn doesn’t. The server tells Earn, “A bottle comes with the table” and then follows it up with, “Yeah, it comes with the table after you buy it.”

At this point Earn is basically Charlie Brown and life is Lucy.

As for Earn racing Michael Vick in Onyx’s parking lot, all I have to say is this: A man’s pride has an uncanny track record of getting the best of him. Earn’s no exception. But man, oh, man, that look of determination as he crouches down waiting for the signal to start? Incredible.

Miscellaneous:

Van’s long-awaited return. It’s about time. After being absent from the first two episodes, Van reappears. Did Beyoncé and Donald Glover plan this weeks in advance? Van talking about her homegirl Christina acting brand-new on her and getting VIP Beyoncé tickets is the greatest example of timing and marketing in recent memory.

“White tears.” Atlanta does it again. While obviously not as intricate as “Florida Man” from episode one, the crying (white) mom is brilliant. For background, that scene, too, was based on an actual video that went viral of a (white) mother moved to tears reading rap lyrics she caught her daughter listening to.

Paper Boi and Darius’ “unique” studio session. Clark County is … interesting. He’s like a cocktail of Will Smith and Suge Knight. We never get the name of his engineer, but you had to figure the guy looked like Martin after fighting Tommy “The Hitman” Hearns in the world-famous “Brawl For It All.” Also: Clark saying he doesn’t smoke or drink, but yet saying that he does in his music — was I the only one who instantly thought of Future saying he doesn’t live the drug-drenched life his music portrays? I couldn’t be. I will say this, though. “Aye, man, I love you, bro. I wouldn’t hurt you. I would never put a hand on you. Just don’t f— up because I’m not the only one with hands in this world” is a golden quote. And did you peep Clark passive-aggressively trying to get Paper Boi to dump Earn as his manager? Something tells me we’ll revisit this again very, very soon.

Justin Tinsley is a culture and sports writer for The Undefeated. He firmly believes “Cash Money Records takin’ ova for da ’99 and da 2000” is the single-most impactful statement of his generation.